Random Jokes

A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the
doctor to come in for the baby's first exam.
The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a
little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed?
'Breast-fed,’ she replied.
'Well, strip down to your waist,' the doctor ordered. She did. He pinched
her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a
very professional and detailed examination.

Motioning to her to get dressed The doctor said, 'No wonder this baby is
underweight. You don't have any milk.'

'I know,' she said, 'I'm his Grandma, but I'm glad I came.'
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A Young woman was pulled over for speeding. A Wisconsin State Trooper
walked to her car window, flipping open his ticket book, she said, "I
bet you are going to sell me a ticket to the State Trooper's Ball. "He
replied, "Wisconsin State Troopers don't have balls." There was a moment
of silence. He then closed his book, got back in his patrol car and left.
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The company commander and the First Sergeant were in the field. As they hit the sack for the night, the First sergeant said, "Sir look up at the sky and tell me what you see?"

The CO said, "I see millions of stars."

1st Sgt, "And what does that tell you, sir"

CO, "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Theologically it tells me God is great and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it tells me that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you, 1st Sgt.?"

"Well sir, it tells me somebody stole our tent."